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Archive for April, 2007

Cake!

One of those silly web things but since I LOVE cake so much here it is anyway!

You Are a Marble Cake

Eclectic, inventive, and peaceful.
You are never willing to accept what’s “normal.” You live to push the envelope.
You find it hard to make up your mind. You prefer to have everything you want, right away!
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6 week Rad Onc checkup

It’s been about 6 weeks since my radiation was completed and today I had my first rad onc checkup. Not a big deal really, how do I feel (fine), any pain, any this, any that, (no, no and no) a pelvic exam (the usual scar tissue, otherwise normal), handshakes and out the door with an appt. for 3 months from now. I told him that my med onc didn’t want to do chemo either (concurring with the Fox Chase med onc) and he said, well, it was such an isolated little thing (glad he thinks so). We also discussed getting a scan. Originally we had talked about having a scan at 3 months post rad, today he was thinking we might want to wait a few more months so that the rad has had the most amount of time to have done it’s job. I see my gyn onc in about a month so he told me that he’d talk to him and see what he thought. He also wanted to talk to him about whether I should have a PET scan. That would make the most sense to me since that is what diagnosed this recurrence (confirmed by the ct-guided biopsy) and the tumor was barely visible on the ct. He was concerned about whether the insurance company would approve it, a common problem these days with insurance companies and PET scans (he made some comment about what we were doing being revolutionary, not sure what he meant by that exactly but he was on his way out the door when he said it so I didn’t ask). In fact at the moment we are going back and forth with the insurance company for my December PET scan as they have paid for everything involving the PET scan except for the radiologist who read it (and of course we keep getting bills from him). Makes no sense, but supposedly the various drs. offices are working on it. So, we’ll see how it all plays out. I don’t really mind the wait in a way, it just puts off the anxiety that I know I am going to feel when I have the scan and am waiting those few days for the results. Actually anxiety is putting it mildly, I think sheer terror is more like it. Right now I’ll just go back to my happy place of denial.

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Spring and softball

Spring is FINALLY here!! Although not to get picky or anything but it’s almost warm enough to be summer, but I won’t complain. Z. had her first day of Wild Things, this very laid back girl’s softball league where the girls mostly work on skills (they don’t play other teams besides themselves and their moms on Mother’s Day weekend and their dads on Father’s Day weekend). It’s perfect for my child who is such a perfectionist that she doesn’t want to play sports because she might look dumb if she’s not perfect immediately (sigh). This is her 2nd year playing with Wild Things so went happily this year, but 2 years ago I couldn’t get her to go at all and last her she only went the first day on the condition that she could just watch and then decide if she wanted to do it. She ended up joining in about a quarter of the way through that first day. I think the big container of Double Bubble gum they had lying out for the girls to chew at will probably had something to do with her deciding this might be an okay thing to do.

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Checking in

I haven’t posted in a while, life is just zipping along these days and I feel like I don’t get anything done. I’m not even sure what in the heck it is I’m doing that’s making me so busy, just life I guess. Among other things in the last few weeks we celebrated both Passover and Easter, Z. was home for a couple weeks for spring break, we had the stairs refinished (on the contractor’s dime since they messed them up during the bathroom construction), we had our family portrait photographed, bought and planted a dogwood tree, celebrated A.’s bday (he’s still plugging along looking for a new job) and I’ve been working on our taxes, ugh!. I still do them myself (on the computer), although every year I think I should just hire someone else to do it, but never do as it seems that most of the work is gathering up all the information and I’d still have to do that. No refund this year so I’ve been putting off filing till the last minute but it’s only hanging over my head this way so I gotta just do them and get them out of my life. I’m going to the Wellness Community a couple of times a week at least these days, besides my regular weekly support group and Open Studio (which had a two week break and starts back up next week) and various other programs here and there I am also participating in a research study once a week for a couple of months there (although it’s run by Jefferson). It’s a study on women with cancer and stress. I am in the experimental group which does the fun stuff like art therapy and meditation. I do however have to actually meditate every day and I’m still trying to figure out how I’m going to fit that in with all the other things I have to do every day. I save too many things for the end of the day, just before bed, and then am up till 1am trying to get them all done so I am going to have to be careful not to do that with this.

I’m feeling a bit better now that it’s been a few weeks since my rad ended but the reflux thing is still hanging around. I can eat more things than I was but I still have to take maximum strength Pepcid twice a day and have to use a chaser of Mylanta before bed some nights. I also have to be really careful with chocolate (why oh why does it have to be chocolate that does me in?) but have been able to taste a little of Z.’s Easter candy 🙂 I overdid it at A.’s family’s Passover seder (my MIL makes this chocolate and caramel coated matzoh that is so good and I made a matzoh baklava that was really yummy) and felt so awful all night long and for two days after. Oh well, it was good while it was going down at least!

As for the complementary stuff I’ve been trying to drink the Avé stuff I bought, but well, it’s yuck and so hard to fit into my life with all its restrictions about when to drink it so I haven’t actually drank any since last Thursday. I don’t think it’s going to be a long term thing (or much of a short term thing either). I have still not made a decision about whether or not to do TM (copper reduction therapy). It’s hard because deciding to do it is a proactive decision and my ambivalence makes it easier not to do anything.

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